Recently realised I have a habit of not talking to people especially to people I dun usually talk to.
Sometimes I prefer to shut myself up to prevent things from going worse. But I realise even without doing anything to some people, they just wan to find problems for me. Well? I should say that I prefer life to be simple and with a few good friends whom I can talk to.

Doesnt mean having lots and tons of friends, means character is good or even to the extend thinking tt good looks maybe the posibility. But for some reasons, I found out that some ppl just think tt way. Not saying that the above mention is not true, but to me this shouldnt be the way. Well, I dun talk much compare to the time in school. I have lost my smiles and my sense of humour due to stress from everywhere. Nobody can understand how stress I am now. I have to manage not just my own attachment company but with another management. Its just totally different from working another part time job. Its management company. Stress and smiles + humour do not come along tgt. There is only one choice for one. I have chosen stress.

My result of choosing stress is having to lose the trust from ppl around me. But tt is not impt to me anymore. Life is not just about having fun like last time. No more time for me to rest and sleep. I have to fastern my pace to get to the next stop. I cant wait for ppl who always stand by me. I just have to run and run and keep running.

I am not a perfect person. I am a human being who have flaws. That is why I do not have the ability to make every single one of the ppl I work with, to accept me as a friend or a nice person.
I love the silent around me most of the time. I love to joke and talk with ppl with common topics with me. I will prefer to stay away from ppl whom I dont communicate. And I have done that. But one thing I dun understnad is, ppl whom I do not talk to much, can oso hurt me. To keep cursing and swearing away from this blog, I guess its time to have jokes apart in my life, seriousness is all I have now.

If really buying a packet of food for me is so hard, then rejection is allowed. Some ppl just dun have to think before talking. Spatting out words, which I can do that too. All I just need is one pair of ears and I can backstab. Its so easy. But because I am a very realistic person, if I dun earn anything from those backstabbing session, then I will save those stuffs for myself. If I can get something I yearn for after back stabbing session, I will be the first to not to save those words anymore. I am not ppl who can let ppl bite me, I will not bite you twice, but thrice. Sit back and relax the pain. But to those ppl who dun hurt me, I will not hurt you lol..people who knows me well. You know(=

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Finally its a very beautiful but yet a moody wednesday for me.
I cant help feeling helpless and just feel like slamming myself to any place that I can sleep.
Wear spects cos eyes uncomfortable. Now see com, my eyes more uncomfortable.
Even spects oso dun wan to wear.

Anyway it will be like another 12 working days to the end of this internship.
I could say there are pro(s) and con(s), but I guess I still prefer my schooling life.
I miss the sports hall.
I miss my school friends.
I miss my juniors.
I miss wearing like shit to school.
I miss the lecturers' faces tho I feel stressful
I miss chionging and get angry over programming which I cant solve the error at all.
I miss my friends.
I miss the gossipping session.
I miss breakfast sessions with my freshies.
I miss after school hours.
I miss waiting for my beloved after school.
I miss taking bus 15 to his hse.
I miss taking bus 39 to meet jamie at her home.
I miss walking to school with her.
I miss miSS MISS~~~~~~

I will still miss my days during the internship for sure.
But what most now the situation is I really miss the life in school more than anything else.
Travelling is easier for me, and all.
I want to head back to school.

Tho major proj can be hard and stressful, but I guess this is student's life.
Nth has no stress.
So I will be counting down..Slowly one day by one day.

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Back from Malaysia(=
Much of a kind of learning experience than fun for me.

The trip by transtar coach bus was fantastic. 4hrs trip in total.
And we reach our Sunway Resort 1hr in advance. So we got to rest and chill for awhile
before we proceed to have a conference. My room mate, Brina.
Tho she always love to bring scariness in the hotel room, but in the end its always laughter.
Haha! After conference we are actually brought to Zen Japanese Restaurant to have our dinner, but lunch at the hotel made me so full until I really couldnt eat more. So we ordered soju. Drank a few cups but feel alrite.

KTV session! Sing and all and drink and all and I finally land myself in a state whereby I cant walk anymore. But fortunately, I was sound and safe back to my hotel in some ways. No hangovers despite tt much of drinking. That actually brings me to the second day where we have our team building challenge! This is the one that I am looking forward for, for this trip. SO FUN!!!! Tho we did not win any prizes, but what is more impt is the games we played tgt as a group and also taking care of one 50 plus colleague. She couldnt walk tt fast so along the way, she has been taken care of. We played a lot of games. All are very excited games. People who are afriad of height for sure will have obstacles to playing those games. But luckily those were fun! :D
Decide to upgrade our ticket to RCS version so we can play everything from the theme park. Then we head to flying fox and AVT and many more.. To my surprise we had physical and heart exercise from 1030am to 6pm which is their opening time to the closing time. I played until my body all aching. Cos most of the activities we played need to climb high level of stairs.

Did not manage to get any photo cos they are not with me yet. But everything was just so fun. Went back to hotel for a bathe before we went down for dinner at Pyramid mall T.R.I.F. They serve big serving food. And omg. Was terrible mann. We actually finish most of them tho we kept pushing around. After a sumptous dinner, we decide to look for shops where we can beautify our nails. But was close to 930pm already (the closing time of the shopping mall), so we decide to book apptmt for the next morning before we left for Singapore. Manage to do up our nails the next morning after our hearty breakfast and then we catch up with our coach and we bought A&W for our lunch!!! So cool! Singapore had this brand swipe out. So have to taste it oversea.

Went back home by cab and was super tired at night. Was fun and here we go, MONDAY!!! Working time(=

P,S: photos will be uploaded soon once I got it.

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Suddenly I feel like flying like a bird. Fly around to places I want to go. Only I can see what is on the land when I am flying! See? This is a very cool feeling, no?

Today just so happen to have time to view some of my friends' profile. And I was shocked that many whom I knew, but not close ones had changed a lot. Perhaps life after secondary school had been a great influence to all of us. I can say that some of them did not do as well as I thought while some really shocked me. They did much better as I thought. Me myself I think I did not change much. The route I have taken is roughly the same. But what I really hate about being who I am now and what kind of life I am leading is that I cant really have time for my own leisure and whatever I want to do. This is like me leading a blind life. I hope to get my life back.

Something I realise last night is that working in the office made me feel that I am all alone. As in there are rooms for communications, but I just slowly learn how not to talk to ppl. This is the worse part of me now. Ya, I agree with ----- that perhaps is not others. But it just me that is having the problem and obstacles. I cant blame nor complain. This is what I have learnt from my current life that I should adapt myself to such a environment. I feel sorry for myself.

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Soon to be it will be the end of oct, and then comes the november. Then will be the end of my internship. Think back, its a rather fast process. I have learnt a lot a lot of things even though I have completed it. But I can sense that my energy level is running low. Headaches bombing in my brains every evening after work. Phlegms in my body giving me tons of probs. I want to feel light-hearted as I first come into this company. But its just so hard to resume back to the old me.

I have grown up more and more. Eye bags getting bigger and bigger. Dark rings getting darker and darker. I guess all these become-uglier process will happen in our life as we grow up. I have yet to really look that terrible yet, but i guess its just a matter of time only(=

I start to miss school days where I can really slack with friends during lessons. Playing facebook games during lessons..oppspp!!!!! :p And even not catching up with lessons, and trying to catch up. Though they are frustrating, but they are not the stressful period as compare as working world is.

Previously I have work in high end sales line before. Now I am working in a Retail management. There is a very much big differences in terms of the job scope wise. But definitely the similar points the two have is that they have their own stress I have to handle. For sales, hitting the daily target is the stressful period, for retail management, doing up quality work in the fastest time is the stressful period. I have really learnt a lot, both from my dad's company and this current company. I learnt how to drive forklift also. LOL..its easy to handle. After the first try, I got it already. So I start lifting up woods and stuff and put them back in place using forklift.

Now that my life is kind of rather fulfilling, I hope I have ample time for my own leisure. I want to spend time for my baby, just like how we used to be when schooling. But those times back there have become our history. No way we can go back to those time again. So I guess what I love to do is to just think back about those times again and again like a replaying movie in my brain. I miss those days. Can the clock turns back? Back to those time? I miss my friends too. Having to eat lunch with them after lessons. And even sneak out for a snack in between lessons. Or even skip lectures. Those days will never be back.

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Motto of the day: I wish to have quiet moments for myself.

I DYE MY HAIR into REDISH BROWN!!!!!!
Not very obvious under the normal light.
But super obvious under the sun......
I love it!!!!!!

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Was watching this korean movie with pris and evan.
Then so happen that this thought just pass by me.
We have been seeing so many pass away everyday, be it natural disasters, sickness or natural death.
Around me, I have personally encounter my own family member just pass away
like that on a Chinese New Year Eve. Life is very unexpected. Similarly, my parent's friend,
also just pass away at home like tt without anyone noticing after one week cos he stay alone.
See the natural disasters in manila and many other countries? So many ppl were passed away
just like tt.

The movie we watched ytd, was about tsunami in korea, very upsetting and scary.
To everyone in that situation, anytime they will be gone in this world.
There is this particular scene whereby I have deep feeling about it:
This 2 life savers went on helicopter to save any people still on the sea.
And so happen that this 2 victims(1 female 1 male) he had previously met before.
The female victim and the life guard love each other.
But because of the male victim, who is a gangster kind, love this girl and violently said that they were engaged, which left this life guard to be heartbroken.

But at this point of time where any point of time the life guard who actually go down and save this girl first, will lose his life too.
Fortunately, nth happen. The girl was saved.
The life guard went down to save the guy, but when the saving belt is about to reach the helicopter, the guy struggle and drop down into the sea again.
This is abit kind of comedy but I promised I was swearing how childish the guy was.
So once again the life guard went down to save him.
Luckily everything was smooth, until when the saving belt was about to reach the helicopter,
the belt was damaged cos of the weight. It cant carry 2 person up.
As the tsunami wave is getting stronger, there is no way anybody down there can survive.
But the life guard give his life up by letting himself down into the sea just to save the male victim.
The female victim whom they deeply in love, was shouting pleading him not to do tt.
As promised previously, the female victim like the life saver's watch a lot. So before he went down, he took out the watch and ask the male victim to pass it to her when he go up.

Very touching!!!! So there goes the life guard down the wave. And the wave ate him up.

Under such circumstances, if i were the girl I will hug him and jump down tgt wearing his watch.
I cant bear to see the guy just die in front of me. I will feel the pain forever. So I might as well die with him. At least we die tgt. (= Not a childish thought, but when time comes, everyday can be the last day.

Do anybody ever thinks if today can be your last day? What will you want to do. It seems that this qns has been reflecting back to me several time, I have lots of things I have not start doing. I want to do but I do not have the courage to do. That the point. I really hope one day not long after today, I will find my courage to do the things I want to do.

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Me?Adeline!Tp IT student..
& yupz 25/7/90 is my first cry(=
Love SweetHeart Cries U&miie

Nth much lorh..for me to know for u to find out!